A mom looks back and wonders what she could have done different.

I like to believe that I am in the homestretch of parenthood, since my youngest turned 21 last May. I don't think there will ever be a point where I am "done" with parenting. I will always worry about my three children, wish for them to be happy and healthy, and want only the best for them (helping out whenever I can and am allowed to).

But being in this stage of parenthood has given me the opportunity to look back at 27 years of parenting (71 years if you count three very different children - each requiring very different parenting styles) and reflect. I have the chance to survey the changes in parenting that have happened over the last few decades and I wonder, if given the chance, if I would I have done things differently.

My first answer is no, because as moms, we do the best we can with what we know at the time. But if I am to really consider it, maybe I would have liked to do a few things differently. Maybe my children would have more happy memories, or our family would have had more fun adventures, or maybe nobody would have had to have stitches.

I truly have no real regrets. My children are adults, seeking out their individual lives. When everyone is in town, we have Sunday brunch together. We laugh with each other and enjoy being together. But still, if I could have, would I have done it differently?

The possibility of doing things differently is what this column is all about. What kinds of things would I have changed? Would I have made a definitive decision of cloth diapers over disposable? (I did both). Should I have been more dedicated to the use of the pacifier? (They spit every one out with a vengeance). Could I have tried harder to get them to drink formula instead of my 24-hour breast feeding service? (They were picky eaters from the get-go). Would I have tried harder to potty-train earlier? (Possibly with the first child - by the third I didn't care). Should I have sent my daughters to charm school? (Perhaps, if I could have gotten her off the roof). Could I have really done anything different?

Maybe.

Even at my stage of parenthood, it's never too late for a mom to have a new idea to examine or a new practice to try out or a new avenue to go down. Every action we take and every decision we make is part of the roller-coaster ride of motherhood. I've had a great ride and it's not over yet. With my three beside me, I can't wait to see what's around the next turn.

About the Author:

Luanne Davidson is the proud mother of three adult children and wonders what might have been if she had done a thing or two differently. She writes her "Coulda, Woudla, Shoulda" column each Thursday.

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